14. Living on the Edge

Oh, man. It's been ages since I even considered makeup. I've been makeup-free for months now. I used to think that I needed mascara. Or that I'd look better with lip stain. I'm glad those days are behind me.

But, really, how far behind? I read somewhere that "every wommon should carry red lipstick with her at all times". The argument was fairly convincing, but I didn't think much of it. Days went by and that little voice in the back of my head creeps in "She's right you know. A decent looking girl like you would look banging if you just started wearing red lipstick.It started innocently enough.... browsing for red, organic, vegan lipstick.

What's the harm? It's organic and it's vegan. It'll look nice, trust me. What?! Nineteen dollars for a lipstick?! Are you kidding me?! Oh, look lip tint. Maybe I'll get that instead. Save a few bucks, ease myself back into the whole makeup thing....

Uh, what am I doing?

First, it's lipstick. Then, it's mascara. Next, eyeliner. But before that, it's eyeshadow and concealer. And finally, I'm living in a mirror because that's how good I want to look for the "real world". I thought I was done with all that. Hence why I left the last of my eyeliner, the final makeup product I owned and used, at home while I attended college. Maybe I should have brought it... as a security blanket it or something.

It's this level of thinking, this "security", that I was trying to break away from. So I did what any self respecting wommon would do...I used Google. I browsed and browsed. Nothing. No empowerment from others who are in my same predicament. No webpage glorifying the beauty one truly possesses. Just crap about How to use makeup to look like you're not wearing makeup, a crappy video that claims guys won't hit on you unless you wear makeup, and countless pictures of how "ugly" celebrities look without makeup.

So here it is. This is my stand. Screw makeup industry. Screw commercials and ads that are designed to make me feel uncomfortable about how I look. This is my face, not a mask. Get used to it cause I'll have the same one for the rest of my life.

Welcome to my first experiment of this blog. I'm not going to lie; I pinched my cheeks and bit my lip a little before I snapped this, but, if I may, HOT DAMN!

This....is me. Messy hair, insecurities, and all. And it doesn't scare me.

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